“Important encounters are planned by the soul long before the bodies see each other.” Paulo Coelho
The moment I saw him, I knew I loved him. In fact, I knew that I had loved him for lifetimes. It was that feeling—the one that hits us hard in that spot between the second and sixth rib and slightly to the left of the sternum.
This is our heart telling us a truth—the recollection that we have been with this person many times before.
I call this a soul relationship, and if we have experienced it, we know. If we haven’t yet, understand that there is a certain spark that comes with it and a subtle peace. An immediate bond of reassurance and stability will wash over us, one that could only be attributed to having been with this particular soul intimately, for centuries before this one.
It took me a long time to jump on the reincarnation bandwagon, a doctrine that has ancient roots and contemporary relevance, since one in four Americans believes in it. But due to personal experiences, now I do too. In fact, I believe we have each lived dozens of times before this one and will live dozens more after. I also hold fast to the faith that on each occasion we incarnate, we do so with similar souls. We choose to be surrounded by people we will recognize, so that this lifetime, we do not feel so alone.
Most of our relationships are not that deep, even if they may appear to be. We can share a lot of history with other human beings and still not be connected at the deepest level. We can have lovers with whom we’ve shared passion and profound intimacy and the sense of a connection that at least felt as if nothing could be deeper—and then, for one reason or another, drift apart. Then, if we meet our former lover years later, we may have the strange and sometimes disturbing sensation of there being literally no connection any more.
Soul relationships are eternal. A significant sign that we are experiencing a soul relationship is that these are the people we can’t resist—even though we want to. The bonfire attraction we have for each other might make us believe we should be together now, but often there is a tragic flaw to this reasoning—the practicalities in this life might not be in our favor.
The truth is, the result of coupling with these irresistible souls can be confusing and painful. Possibly with a temptation so electric, we use the motivation of “should,” a little too strongly. We believe meeting someone with whom it feels we have known forever “should” work.
But, timing is everything. Just because we were together in a previous life does not mean we can be together in this one.
This reminds me that soul relationships are more complex than I can intellectually understand.
Each soul evolves at different speed, and this time, we might be on a different trajectory. This does not make the relationship or connection untrue. It just means that the other is bound in their perception by limitations on the personality level and cannot register or be aware of the deeper significance. The discrepancy between our own perception of things and that of someone else can lead to disappointment and even to sorrow if we do not understand that what exists at the soul level has to find its way into physical expression in its own way and time. In some instances, this may not happen nor serve the highest good within a particular lifetime.
Life unfolds in mysterious ways and in the end, the connections with others on the level of the soul enrich life immeasurably, and add to the dimension of the physical, the dimension of the spiritual. These relationships will one day become quite natural and commonplace, for they represent the progressive unfolding of the beauty and promise of our capacity as spiritual beings to live a sacred life.